"He's his own worst enemy."
Rowan Atkinson lives life and goes about things all wrong in a comedy of heartbreak and hilarity and missed opportunities.
(Inspired by a comment in one of Jon's Facebook games.)
Monday, July 13, 2009
My Best Friend's Shoes
"You Think YOU'VE Got It Bad"
Mid-to-late 30s consultant bored with life and frustrated by the demands of his high-stress job and repeated problems with home repair wishes for a change. Meanwhile across the country, his friend, a mid-to-late 30s screenwriter, is living with his folks and frustrated that he hasn't sold a script. He also wishes for a change. At the exact same time. Which was July 8, 2009, at 12:34:56am. And magic happens. They switch places. You know how the rest goes.
Ideally, I am thinking perhaps Jason Bateman and Robert Downey Jr . Although I could totally dig a Steve Zahn & Sam Rockwell reunion (yes, another one). For the mother, how about Shirley Knight, since Debbie Reynolds is taken.
(Inspired by a comment by Jon on List Anything)
Mid-to-late 30s consultant bored with life and frustrated by the demands of his high-stress job and repeated problems with home repair wishes for a change. Meanwhile across the country, his friend, a mid-to-late 30s screenwriter, is living with his folks and frustrated that he hasn't sold a script. He also wishes for a change. At the exact same time. Which was July 8, 2009, at 12:34:56am. And magic happens. They switch places. You know how the rest goes.
Ideally, I am thinking perhaps Jason Bateman and Robert Downey Jr . Although I could totally dig a Steve Zahn & Sam Rockwell reunion (yes, another one). For the mother, how about Shirley Knight, since Debbie Reynolds is taken.
(Inspired by a comment by Jon on List Anything)
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Craig's List
From the director of Goo Ghoul and Ya Who comes this horrifying look into the true face of evil. The students at Hulu High are being picked off one by one but Detective Jo Blo (Sarah Michelle Gellar) is on the case, and she never loses. When she finds a secret passage in the basement of the school, Jo discovers the janitor's room where Craig Wokalski (Lou Diamond Phillips) has been living for years. But even more horrifying is the list she finds; 9 students and five already have their names crossed off.
Now, Jo must beat the clock to save the remaining four students from a grisly death and also put an ad on craiglist for a new janitor (they very well can't keep Craig on after this discovery).
"School's out...forever"
Now, Jo must beat the clock to save the remaining four students from a grisly death and also put an ad on craiglist for a new janitor (they very well can't keep Craig on after this discovery).
"School's out...forever"
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Sudoku
Ben Carter (Nicolas Cage) is an American cop living in Tokyo. His partner, Okubo (Ken Watanabe), dies during a drug sting operation along with several important members of the Yakuza. Now, three years later, Ben's wife and child are kidnapped and he has forty eight hours to get them back safely but whomever has them isn't making it easy.
Ben is mailed a large map of Tokyo that has been broken up into a grid holding 81 squares. Several of the numbers have already been filled in (each number representing the number of people murdered in that area) and Ben has to complete the puzzle to find the last number "2" (representing his wife and child). As Ben goes deeper into the sick, twisted world of japanese number puzzles, he discovers some interesting things about his ex-partner. Now, with the clock ticking, Ben must unravel the clues that hold the key to the whereabouts of his wife and child along with who might be behind this high stakes game of cat and mouse.
Directed by Joel Schumacher.
Ben is mailed a large map of Tokyo that has been broken up into a grid holding 81 squares. Several of the numbers have already been filled in (each number representing the number of people murdered in that area) and Ben has to complete the puzzle to find the last number "2" (representing his wife and child). As Ben goes deeper into the sick, twisted world of japanese number puzzles, he discovers some interesting things about his ex-partner. Now, with the clock ticking, Ben must unravel the clues that hold the key to the whereabouts of his wife and child along with who might be behind this high stakes game of cat and mouse.
Directed by Joel Schumacher.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Air Bud: Surfer, Dog
Steve Cooter (Matthew McConaughey) is having a bad day. He overslept and lost his job, his pot dealer and best friend (Kevin Corrigan) got arrested, and his fiance (Heather Graham)broke up with him because he's a 35-year old pot head who lives in his mother's basement and only lives for the surf. After drowning his sorrows in pot and beer, Steve takes his jeep out for a spin in hopes of saving his relationship but when a poodle runs out in front of his jeep, Steve is forced off the road and welcomed into the cold arms of death...
...or so we think.
Now, Steve has been given a second chance in the body of 'Bud', that cooky, incredibly talented dog from the other movies in the "Air Bud" series such as "Air Bud: Golden Receiver" and "Air Bud: Seventh Inning Fetch". Bud roams the beaches in search of someone, anyone who can help him get back to his human form when he comes across Dune (Luke Wilson). Dune adopts Bud as his own and discovers that Bud has some skillz when it comes to surfing. Suddenly, Dune and Bud are thrust into the spotlight and become celebrities and heroes to humans and dogs alike. Because Bud can surf. And not just like, when you put a dog on a surfboard and push him out into the water FORCING him to surf against his will. No, Bud picks up the surfboard and catches his own waves. It's really something to see which is why they become famous. But that's just the beginning.
Like anything else that is rare, Bud's talents become coveted by the head of the Green Corporation, Thad Burrows (Eric Mcormick), who hires thugs (Scott Caan, Seann William Scott) to steal Bud away from Dune. But even thugs have hearts, and after spending only a few minutes with Bud and Dune, the thugs change their minds about what's important in life and turn the screws on their greedy, meany meany boss.
A perfect double feature with Smooches 3, Air Bud; Surfer, Dog, is a must see this Valentine's Day.
...or so we think.
Now, Steve has been given a second chance in the body of 'Bud', that cooky, incredibly talented dog from the other movies in the "Air Bud" series such as "Air Bud: Golden Receiver" and "Air Bud: Seventh Inning Fetch". Bud roams the beaches in search of someone, anyone who can help him get back to his human form when he comes across Dune (Luke Wilson). Dune adopts Bud as his own and discovers that Bud has some skillz when it comes to surfing. Suddenly, Dune and Bud are thrust into the spotlight and become celebrities and heroes to humans and dogs alike. Because Bud can surf. And not just like, when you put a dog on a surfboard and push him out into the water FORCING him to surf against his will. No, Bud picks up the surfboard and catches his own waves. It's really something to see which is why they become famous. But that's just the beginning.
Like anything else that is rare, Bud's talents become coveted by the head of the Green Corporation, Thad Burrows (Eric Mcormick), who hires thugs (Scott Caan, Seann William Scott) to steal Bud away from Dune. But even thugs have hearts, and after spending only a few minutes with Bud and Dune, the thugs change their minds about what's important in life and turn the screws on their greedy, meany meany boss.
A perfect double feature with Smooches 3, Air Bud; Surfer, Dog, is a must see this Valentine's Day.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Monday, February 11, 2008
Saturday, February 9, 2008
The Corrector
From the caterers of Wild Hogs and the sound team from Anchorman, comes this hilarious story of one guy and his buddies. Sten is basically a good man, if a little reclusive. He doesn't really like people that much; he thinks most of them are stupid. He spends most of his time with his friend Ennis. He corrects everything Ennis says, because Sten has a college degree, and Ennis doesn't. He also corrects his friends Lane, Eric, and Gan* all the time, like when they stupidly call a "backpack" a "bookbag,"
The actor that will play Sten would need to be real good at the Napoleon Dynamite voice, yelling things, and generally looking exasperated.
Once people see the movie, one word from The Corrector will be sweeping the nation, in an Office Space sort of way. You see, at Christmas, Sten gets some new shoes-with-wheels. Whenever Lane, Eric, Gan and Ennis see him rolling around they say, "Nice wheelies, nerd."
In response, Sten hits the brakes, turns around, tenses his shoulder, and yells, "HEELIES!" in his best disgusted grunt.
This post open for all suggestions -- plot, casting, deletion...
The actor that will play Sten would need to be real good at the Napoleon Dynamite voice, yelling things, and generally looking exasperated.
Once people see the movie, one word from The Corrector will be sweeping the nation, in an Office Space sort of way. You see, at Christmas, Sten gets some new shoes-with-wheels. Whenever Lane, Eric, Gan and Ennis see him rolling around they say, "Nice wheelies, nerd."
In response, Sten hits the brakes, turns around, tenses his shoulder, and yells, "HEELIES!" in his best disgusted grunt.
This post open for all suggestions -- plot, casting, deletion...
Friday, February 8, 2008
The Cobbler
Gordon is a lonely, pudgy little boy. His dad is a shoemaker. His mom is a dessert maker. All the kids make fun of him and the cute girls are really, really mean to him. "His dad makes shoes!" "His mom makes pies. And eats them." "They are all fat." Hilarious. [Titles.]
Many years later Gordon (Chris Klein) is older and much cuter. He is on a date with a pretty little thing. They drink, dance; she takes him back to her place. He pours her some more drinks. Foreplay. He gets out some leather from his trendy bag. Then some nails. And he makes a shoe on top of her head.
The next day the cops (namely, Josh Brolin, as Peterson) are there, investigating the weird, suffocated, shoe-headed women. He lights a cigarette and yells at some extras. Over the next few months, Gordon makes some more shoes on top of hot girls' heads. They die. Peterson figures out there is a serial killer on the loose. He names him, The Cobbler.
Gordon reads the newspapers and is shocked he has been labeled so quickly. Ashamed, but still out to kill hot girls, he thinks of a new M.O., this time in defense of his mom. He starts dating a hot girl (Tara Reid, desperate for work). One night he makes some apple cobbler. He force feeds her in this weird foreplay deal. She dies. He dumps her on the side of the road. Things are bad in town, so the FBI is called in. The crack FBI team is Wesley Snipes (Hudson) and Rasheeda Jones (Reese).
When the FBI shows up, Peterson is freaked out. Peterson and Hudson argue a bunch. Peterson and Reese make eyes at each other a lot, while arguing.
When Gordon hears the FBI is after him, he isn't worried. Until he preys on his next victim and just before offing her, she becomes suspicious and runs away. He finally catches her in a back alley and in a fit of rage, he bludgeons her to death with the first thing he can get his hands on: a loose cobblestone pulled from the ancient street.
So now the crack FBI team of Hudson and Reese are after this town's three (3) brutal killers. Reese has a computer that makes lots of noises and is full of databases. Reese is also smart, almost as smart as her computer.
In the key scene she points to pictures of the dead girls and says, "Cobbled. Cobbled. Cobbled. They're all the same guy."
Her smart, noisy computer searches its databases and narrows down the list of potential murderers to sons of cobblers and cobbler-makers who have anger-management problems. There are only (only!) three in town. (Reese's computer is smart like that.)
Peterson, Hudson, and Reese, each go to a residence of one of the three cobbler's/cobbler-maker's sons-with-anger-management-problem's houses.
I don't know which one is at the right house yet because I haven't read the results from the test audiences.
Many years later Gordon (Chris Klein) is older and much cuter. He is on a date with a pretty little thing. They drink, dance; she takes him back to her place. He pours her some more drinks. Foreplay. He gets out some leather from his trendy bag. Then some nails. And he makes a shoe on top of her head.
The next day the cops (namely, Josh Brolin, as Peterson) are there, investigating the weird, suffocated, shoe-headed women. He lights a cigarette and yells at some extras. Over the next few months, Gordon makes some more shoes on top of hot girls' heads. They die. Peterson figures out there is a serial killer on the loose. He names him, The Cobbler.
Gordon reads the newspapers and is shocked he has been labeled so quickly. Ashamed, but still out to kill hot girls, he thinks of a new M.O., this time in defense of his mom. He starts dating a hot girl (Tara Reid, desperate for work). One night he makes some apple cobbler. He force feeds her in this weird foreplay deal. She dies. He dumps her on the side of the road. Things are bad in town, so the FBI is called in. The crack FBI team is Wesley Snipes (Hudson) and Rasheeda Jones (Reese).
When the FBI shows up, Peterson is freaked out. Peterson and Hudson argue a bunch. Peterson and Reese make eyes at each other a lot, while arguing.
When Gordon hears the FBI is after him, he isn't worried. Until he preys on his next victim and just before offing her, she becomes suspicious and runs away. He finally catches her in a back alley and in a fit of rage, he bludgeons her to death with the first thing he can get his hands on: a loose cobblestone pulled from the ancient street.
So now the crack FBI team of Hudson and Reese are after this town's three (3) brutal killers. Reese has a computer that makes lots of noises and is full of databases. Reese is also smart, almost as smart as her computer.
In the key scene she points to pictures of the dead girls and says, "Cobbled. Cobbled. Cobbled. They're all the same guy."
Her smart, noisy computer searches its databases and narrows down the list of potential murderers to sons of cobblers and cobbler-makers who have anger-management problems. There are only (only!) three in town. (Reese's computer is smart like that.)
Peterson, Hudson, and Reese, each go to a residence of one of the three cobbler's/cobbler-maker's sons-with-anger-management-problem's houses.
I don't know which one is at the right house yet because I haven't read the results from the test audiences.
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Smooches Pt II - "It all started with a SpBark!"
Unlike most body switching movies, Terry Cuddles never turns back human. And Vanessa gives him up for pet adoption. She moves outside the city to
**Alternate Ending**
At the end of the credits, after all the film neophytes have left the movie theatre leaving only the hardcore nerds with RTF degrees, Howie and Smooches pass Vanessa and Josh rollerskating on the side of the road in their convertible. They make a u-turn and throw old 'za and breadsticks and marinara sauce at them. and they eat it. because they are homeless rollerskaters.
Smooches
The perfect Valentine's day movie, Smooches tells the story of Terry Cuddles (Rob Schneider) who buys a dog (Smooches) so he can win over the girl of his dreams, Vanessa (Teri Polo) . But when an electrical storm causes changes in the atmosphere, Terry and Smooches switch bodies in the middle of the night!
Now, Terry has to convince Vanessa that just because he's a dog, doesn't mean he can't love like man (and just imagine the hysterics when Smooches adjusts to his new human body!). A cross between Like Father Like Son, Freaky Friday, All of Me, Vice Versa, Switch, The Hot Chick, Big, Heart and Souls, and Meet Joe Black.
Now, Terry has to convince Vanessa that just because he's a dog, doesn't mean he can't love like man (and just imagine the hysterics when Smooches adjusts to his new human body!). A cross between Like Father Like Son, Freaky Friday, All of Me, Vice Versa, Switch, The Hot Chick, Big, Heart and Souls, and Meet Joe Black.
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
'Gna!
Well, what do you know? 'Za was a hit and now they want a sequel and the whole gang has sold out!
Courtney went off to Hollywood and, can you believe it?, became the hottest starlet in town. Because she's such a genuine sweetheart, though, the first place she runs is back to Hometown to see Joe. And she even takes the bus. She steps off to a Rilo Kiley tune and into Joe's arms.
Joe has been wanting to see Vince and the moppet, and Courtney's been longing to do some theatre, so they head to the The City. In a car. The bright lights glare and the Postal Service plays and they just love it so much, they decide to move. After selling Pete's to Hometown's misfit orphan Josh (Justin Long) for a buck, Joe decides to go in on a joint venture with Vince and Courtney and they open their new restaurant Mama's 'Gna. Frank's mom's secret lasagna recipe quickly becomes the biggest hit in town and our three heroes are the toast of the city. "Four stars!" everyone reads in the paper.
And you know what success means....DRUGS. Drugs, and crying, and tantrums, and drama. Even little teen moppet gets in on the action. It is a big mess, and then everyone cries and hugs and after some bummer scenes with Iron and Wine music, everyone cries some more and gets better and grows up and then there's a big symbolic New Year's Eve party at Gna where everyone is beautiful and Arcade Fire's "Wake Up" plays the camera out the window into the city lights.
I think somewhere in there Josh managed to marry Ellen Page. She is a teacher.
Courtney went off to Hollywood and, can you believe it?, became the hottest starlet in town. Because she's such a genuine sweetheart, though, the first place she runs is back to Hometown to see Joe. And she even takes the bus. She steps off to a Rilo Kiley tune and into Joe's arms.
Joe has been wanting to see Vince and the moppet, and Courtney's been longing to do some theatre, so they head to the The City. In a car. The bright lights glare and the Postal Service plays and they just love it so much, they decide to move. After selling Pete's to Hometown's misfit orphan Josh (Justin Long) for a buck, Joe decides to go in on a joint venture with Vince and Courtney and they open their new restaurant Mama's 'Gna. Frank's mom's secret lasagna recipe quickly becomes the biggest hit in town and our three heroes are the toast of the city. "Four stars!" everyone reads in the paper.
And you know what success means....DRUGS. Drugs, and crying, and tantrums, and drama. Even little teen moppet gets in on the action. It is a big mess, and then everyone cries and hugs and after some bummer scenes with Iron and Wine music, everyone cries some more and gets better and grows up and then there's a big symbolic New Year's Eve party at Gna where everyone is beautiful and Arcade Fire's "Wake Up" plays the camera out the window into the city lights.
I think somewhere in there Josh managed to marry Ellen Page. She is a teacher.
Whitney's Protection Program
Whitney White (Evan Rachel Wood) is one troubled high school student. She's been expelled twice and her parents are running out of ideas. She drinks, she smokes, and she even breaks into the school after hours. But one fateful night, Whitney overhears a murder while writing graffiti on the bathroom walls and has to run for her life from the killer (Ed Harris).
With nowhere else to go, Whitney turns to her Uncle, Jack Driftwood (Keifer Sutherland), an F.B.I. agent with problems of his own. He drinks too much, smokes too much, and uses his fists to solve disputes. But now Jack has some growing up to do if he wants to keep Whitney safe and bring down the mob boss (James Caan) behind the hit.
With nowhere else to go, Whitney turns to her Uncle, Jack Driftwood (Keifer Sutherland), an F.B.I. agent with problems of his own. He drinks too much, smokes too much, and uses his fists to solve disputes. But now Jack has some growing up to do if he wants to keep Whitney safe and bring down the mob boss (James Caan) behind the hit.
'Za!
The movie opens on a pair of kids in the 70s eating lunch with their working class dad, Pete (that annoying heart problem guy from Grey's Anatomy) in a pizzeria. The dad talks wistfully about his unrealized dream of his own restaurant. The kids listen for a while as they eat. The boring story ends, the kids fight over the last piece, the cheese pulls, draws, and snaps. Cut to opening credits. Fade In. Now 30 years older, the brothers - Joe (Sam Rockwell) and Vince (Steve Zahn) - are standing in front of an open grave. Dad is dead and they are sad. Joe still works in town, but Vince has had to drive in all the way from The City where he works as A Rich Investment Banker. Joe is, you guessed it, single; and Vince is, say it with me, divorced. His ex-wife is, yep, angry at him, and his kid, obviously, never gets to see him. His wife is, let's say, Sara, and is played by Carla Gugino or whatever her name is. His kid is annoying moppy headed child actor #53. Yeah, the one from Oklahoma City.
So for some reason Vince is persuaded to stay in The Hometown to get his mother, Frances (Rosemary Harris) in a nursing home or some shit and while he is there has this life-changing idea to help Joe open a pizzeria in honor of his dad. I am sure it will be called Pete's. Pete's 'Za. (That's what Pete's mother always called it.)
They hire a waitress, Courtney (Mandy Moore), who is studying at the local community college but wants to be an actress. She somehow manages to fall for both and/or either of them. They fight over her. They fight over what kind of 'za they should sell. They fight and make up. Vince's moppet comes to visit and they all have fun. Joe and Courtney fall in love. Pete's makes money. Everyone is happy.
But then everyone is sad. Now that Pete's is a smashing success, Vince can go back to The City and his important job. Before he drives off in his stupid Range Rover, there is hugging and double-back-pats. Courtney is now done with community college and has to make her big break for Hollywood. They make out and she leaves on a bus. (She is probably going to end up a hooker, but that is neither here nor there.)
Joe is alone but he has Pete's and he has money and everything is right with the world, in a melancholy-but-totally-ok sort of way.
*Cue Josh Ritter Music.*
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Toiletries
In this hilarious computer-animated film by Pixar (hint hint), we get follow the adventures of Tommy the Toothbrush (voiced by Ben Stiller) as he settles into his new home and tries to deal with living only a couple feet away from Flushy the Toilet (voiced by Isaac Hayes) and the germs he spreads every time he's flushed. Tommy quickly makes friends with his new roommates, Hilda the Hairbrush (voiced by Meryl Streep) and Craig the electric nose hair clipper (voiced by Seth Green) and with their help tries to relocate further away from Flushy. But there's only one problem...he doesn't have legs!
If You Only Knew
Billionaire Ripley Price (Mathew McConaughey) has it all -- Beautiful women, expensive cars, and an exhilarating sense of adventure. He spends his days skydiving and his nights on various beaches around the world (most of which, he owns). But Ripley's life is turned upside down when a surprise visit from an ex-one-night-stand (Justine Bateman) reveals something he could never conquer...an eight year-old daughter with autism (Elle Fanning).Now Ripley must choose between his life of risk and the risk of losing the best thing that ever happened to him. His business partner (Nicky Katt) is going behind his back to take over the empire and his ex-wife (Leslie Mann) is ruining his reputation with every word she prints in the biggest Gossip Magazine in New York. Will Ripley own up to the responsibility that comes with an autistic daughter? Or will he save his dynasty and look after his own interests like he always has?
* note - one of the endings should have something to do with him starting a school for autistic children. Just saying.
The Stranger
Young William Martin Joel (Daniel Radcliffe - using a New York accent and gaining 30 pounds) is a piano prodigy born in The Bronx, who starts to rebel against his tough neighborhood upbringing by taking on a rock-n-roll persona everyone will come to know and love as Billy Joel.
Now, older and successful (Sean Astin), Billy deals with his success and drug habits as well as struggling with a boxing career and learning to deal with dating supermodels like Christie Brinkley (Sienna Miller - they really didn't meet until much later but will make the movie more dramatic). The majority of the movie focuses on Billy's struggle with being ugly and stupid but really really rich.
Eventually, Billy overcomes his fears and starts writing again, putting out a grammy award winning album with a hit song that basically lists major turning points in history.
*Academy Award nods to Daniel Radcliffe, Sean Astin, Sienna Miller
***Please note that The Stranger and Rocket Man are sold as a double feature only.
Now, older and successful (Sean Astin), Billy deals with his success and drug habits as well as struggling with a boxing career and learning to deal with dating supermodels like Christie Brinkley (Sienna Miller - they really didn't meet until much later but will make the movie more dramatic). The majority of the movie focuses on Billy's struggle with being ugly and stupid but really really rich.
Eventually, Billy overcomes his fears and starts writing again, putting out a grammy award winning album with a hit song that basically lists major turning points in history.
*Academy Award nods to Daniel Radcliffe, Sean Astin, Sienna Miller
***Please note that The Stranger and Rocket Man are sold as a double feature only.
Rocket Man
Young Reginald Dwight (Daniel Radcliffe) is a piano prodigy born in Pinner, Middlesex, who starts to rebel against his strict parents by taking on a rock-n-roll persona everyone will come to know and love as Elton John.
Now, older and successful (Hugo Weaving), Elton deals with his success and drug habits as well as coming out of the closet and revealing to the world his relationship with his lyricist, Bernie Taupin (Kevin Spacey -- this part isn't true but will make the movie more dramatic). The majority of the movie focuses on Elton's hiatus from performing in 1976 and the three years he spent secluded in one of his three mansions.
Eventually, Elton overcomes his fears and starts writing again, putting out a grammy award winning soundtrack for The Lion King and changing his lyrics to his most famous song, Candle in the Wind, to pay homage to Princess Diane.
*Academy Award nods to Daniel Radcliffe, Hugo Weaving, Kevin Spacey
Now, older and successful (Hugo Weaving), Elton deals with his success and drug habits as well as coming out of the closet and revealing to the world his relationship with his lyricist, Bernie Taupin (Kevin Spacey -- this part isn't true but will make the movie more dramatic). The majority of the movie focuses on Elton's hiatus from performing in 1976 and the three years he spent secluded in one of his three mansions.
Eventually, Elton overcomes his fears and starts writing again, putting out a grammy award winning soundtrack for The Lion King and changing his lyrics to his most famous song, Candle in the Wind, to pay homage to Princess Diane.
*Academy Award nods to Daniel Radcliffe, Hugo Weaving, Kevin Spacey
Top Gun: Thrusters On
It's been 5 years since Charlie (Kelly McGillis) has felt the fire of love in her loins. After Maverick died in a tragic motorcycle accident, her life has been ripped apart both financially and psychologically. Now, she must pick up the shattered pieces of her life and start over with the only thing Maverick left behind, his Auto Shop, "The Goose".
After unsuccessfully searching for a mechanic, a stranger blows into town in slow motion through a puff of smoke on a motorcycle, turning out to be none other than Maverick's nephew, Tate (Ashton Kutcher). Tate's got the best hands in the business and after transforming The Goose into a financial success, turns his attentions towards the much much much older and grosser Charlie, teaching us that love has no limits. Really. None.
*Straight to Video please.
After unsuccessfully searching for a mechanic, a stranger blows into town in slow motion through a puff of smoke on a motorcycle, turning out to be none other than Maverick's nephew, Tate (Ashton Kutcher). Tate's got the best hands in the business and after transforming The Goose into a financial success, turns his attentions towards the much much much older and grosser Charlie, teaching us that love has no limits. Really. None.
*Straight to Video please.
Vitamin Water
At a time when too much is taken for granted, Vitamin Water is a story to remind us of the important things in life and our need to enrich ourselves when the opportunity comes along.
Aging beauty Renae Holcomb (Susan Sarandon) has let life pass her by these past few years. Now in the process of a bitter divorce with her husband, David (John Heard), she is at the end of her rope. It doesn't help that David is leaving her for a younger woman, an interior designer named Phoebe (Judy Greer). David, an attorney, has also done his best to make sure none of the good lawyers in town take Renae's side.
Left with few options, Renae has found an attorney on the other side of town. Sam (Mandy Patinkin) is a good guy, divorced, with a couple of kids. If he wins this case, he would have more than enough money to put his young daughter, Madison (X Fanning), through private school. He also wants to help his son, Jacob (Zac Efron), get his fitness studio off the ground.
Meanwhile, over at the studio, Jacob has been looking for someone to enter into the Fabulous Females Over Fifty Fitness Competition to help get the word out about his new business. One afternoon Jacob stops by his dad's office to bring over the loan papers, and meets Renae.
Jacob, convinced Renae is the one for the competition, persuades her to get her body - and her life - back in shape. But neither of them could have guessed at the strange and wonderful bond that would form between them.
With so much riding on the case and the competition, there will be no rest for the weary. But as each character experiences the changes brought on by these unexpected events, they just might find it was all worth it in the end.
A cross between The First Wives Club, You Got Served, and Harold & Maude, Vitamin Water is sure to be a hit with everyone!
Note: Brenda Dickson (http://www.brendadickson.com/) keeps calling me for consideration in the lead role, but I believe a producer would be better served going with a more recognizable name. Unless this thing is straight-to-YouTube, then Ms. Dickson is a great bet.
Aging beauty Renae Holcomb (Susan Sarandon) has let life pass her by these past few years. Now in the process of a bitter divorce with her husband, David (John Heard), she is at the end of her rope. It doesn't help that David is leaving her for a younger woman, an interior designer named Phoebe (Judy Greer). David, an attorney, has also done his best to make sure none of the good lawyers in town take Renae's side.
Left with few options, Renae has found an attorney on the other side of town. Sam (Mandy Patinkin) is a good guy, divorced, with a couple of kids. If he wins this case, he would have more than enough money to put his young daughter, Madison (X Fanning), through private school. He also wants to help his son, Jacob (Zac Efron), get his fitness studio off the ground.
Meanwhile, over at the studio, Jacob has been looking for someone to enter into the Fabulous Females Over Fifty Fitness Competition to help get the word out about his new business. One afternoon Jacob stops by his dad's office to bring over the loan papers, and meets Renae.
Jacob, convinced Renae is the one for the competition, persuades her to get her body - and her life - back in shape. But neither of them could have guessed at the strange and wonderful bond that would form between them.
With so much riding on the case and the competition, there will be no rest for the weary. But as each character experiences the changes brought on by these unexpected events, they just might find it was all worth it in the end.
A cross between The First Wives Club, You Got Served, and Harold & Maude, Vitamin Water is sure to be a hit with everyone!
Note: Brenda Dickson (http://www.brendadickson.com/) keeps calling me for consideration in the lead role, but I believe a producer would be better served going with a more recognizable name. Unless this thing is straight-to-YouTube, then Ms. Dickson is a great bet.
The Trader
In the not too distant future, humans are the stock market, and John Dodger (Keanu Reeves) trades with their lives every day. Society runs on the basic premise of decency and hard work. Divorce, alcoholism, and other vices can lower the worth of your stock thereby marking you as expendable.
But when John's stock plummets without reason, he's on the run for his life as The Skye corporation sends out AGENTS (Mickey Rourke, Michael Madsen) to find John and kill him. With the help of some loyal friends (Diane Lane, Terrance Howard) John discovers the truth behind the Skye corporation's legacy of greed and dishonesty, as well as the truth behind his own past --- John was once an Agent for the Skye Corporation but was brainwashed and reprogrammed to live his life as a stock broker so the Skye Corporation could invest in him from the base level and make millions of dollars off of his progress. This time, however, they picked the wrong target.
But when John's stock plummets without reason, he's on the run for his life as The Skye corporation sends out AGENTS (Mickey Rourke, Michael Madsen) to find John and kill him. With the help of some loyal friends (Diane Lane, Terrance Howard) John discovers the truth behind the Skye corporation's legacy of greed and dishonesty, as well as the truth behind his own past --- John was once an Agent for the Skye Corporation but was brainwashed and reprogrammed to live his life as a stock broker so the Skye Corporation could invest in him from the base level and make millions of dollars off of his progress. This time, however, they picked the wrong target.
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